Miranda looks like she wants to puke. I’m a little surprised considering I thought she wanted me and Creed to be friends again.

“I’m gonna go,” Zack says, turning and striding off, his towel thrown over his muscular shoulders, his shorts riding low on his hips. I can’t look at Creed, and Windsor’s satisfied smirk is infuriating, so I stand up and climb out of the hot tub, snatching my towel as I pass Andrew. He just looks embarrassed, and confused. Guess I would be, too, if I thought my friend was out for revenge and ended up making her tormenter orgasm in a hot tub.

“Zack, wait,” I call out, padding after him, cheeks red, body flushed. He makes it outside before I grab hold of his arm and get him to whirl on me.

“Did you just screw him?” he shouts, but I’m shaking my head and then covering my face with my hands. “I thought you didn’t believe in these stupid Infinity Club bets? I get what you’re trying to do, but to go so far? To fuck a guy you hate? How could you, Marnye?”

“He … we were just kissing, and he …” I have no idea what to say, and I end up dropping my arms by my sides. Zack just stares at me and swallows hard. When he kisses me, I let him. I let him sweep my wet body up against his, and I love being in his arms so much that I’m … confused.

Did I cheat on Zack with Creed? Or am I cheating on Creed with Zack? Did I cheat on either of them when I kissed Tristan? Oh god. I’m not a cheater. I hate cheaters. Jennifer is a cheater. I can’t be.

“How are you going to choose?”

Miranda asked me that question last year. I hated it then. I hate it even more now.

I push Zack away from me, wrap my towel around my shoulders, and run all the way back to my dorm.

“Whatever you did,” Miranda says, as I eat my food as fast as I can. I just want to finish my meal and get out of The Mess before Tristan, Zayd, Creed, Zack, or Windsor shows up. Is that too much to ask? “Creed is now obsessed with you.” I choke on a cherry tomato, but I can’t ignore the slight accusation in her words.

“Are you okay?” I ask, and she sighs, putting her elbows on the table and resting her chin in her palms.

“You must be up to something. There’s no way you’d forgive my brother quite so easily.” I stab another piece of lettuce and bring it to my lips. “I believe you when you say you didn’t sleep with him, but whatever happened … I don’t think you even understood it. Are you sure you know what you’re doing?”

“I told you,” I whisper, keeping my voice low. There are other students eating in the restaurant with us, but they’re all Plebs. We’re relatively safe, but I don’t doubt any overheard conversation will make it back to Harper. “He just … came.” Miranda wrinkles her nose and looks at me in horror.

“Please stop saying that. It’s so freaking gross. That’s my brother. My twin. I don’t want to hear about his … eww. Just no.” She sighs and sits up straight, pausing as the door opens and … Zack walks in. Oh fantastic. He spots me right away and makes a beeline straight for this table. Would it be wrong if I just got up and ran?

He sits down next to me, and awkward silence descends.

“Can we have a moment alone?” Zack asks, and Miranda rolls her eyes.

“Yeah, sure. Babe, come find me later and we’ll all watch RuPaul in Andrew’s room, okay?” I nod, and she takes off. I stare at my salad while I wait for Zack to talk.

“Are you mad at me?” he asks, and my head jerks up and around. My brows are crinkled, and I’m so beyond confused I don’t quite know what to say.

“Aren’t you mad at me?” I ask, and he sighs, jaw clenching as he looks away. “I … did that with Creed, and …”

“I already told you, we can’t be together. I don’t fucking deserve you, Marnye. It was wrong of me to react like that. I know there’s no future for us.” My heart drops, and I want to scream. There could be a future for us, you idiot! Fight for me. But at the same time, I feel like a cheater who doesn’t deserve Zack. I feel like my mom.

“I cheated on you,” I choke, and he spins to face me with his eyes wide.

“Cheated? You can’t cheat on someone you’re not with.” He stares at me with so much longing that my heart begins to pound, and I feel like I might pass out. Things only get worse when the Idol boys stroll into the room and spot us there in the corner.

Tristan’s nostrils flare at the sight of Zack, Creed immediately makes his way over to me, and Zayd gives a cute, little wave.

Crap. Crap, crap, crap.

I shoot up from my chair, heart pounding, as Creed puts an arm on either side of me and pins me to the wall.

“Avoiding me won’t do you any good,” he says, and I think I forget my own name for a minute there.

“I wasn’t avoiding you,” I whisper, wondering how much he’s told Tristan and Zayd. The other two look a bit confused, to be honest. “I just … I have a lot going on, okay?” Creed narrows his eyes on me and then glances at Zack like he’s garbage.

“Why don’t you get lost, so Marnye and I can talk?”

“Marnye, and I were talking, so how about you fuck all the way off?” Zack snarls. Tristan pretends like he doesn’t give a shit and heads straight for the Idols’ table. He is engaged, after all, and I make a mental note to push harder with him. April is already coming to a close, and what have I accomplished this month besides … spending time in a hot tub with Creed.

Putting my palm on Creed’s chest, I push him back a step and move away from the two guys. Zayd watches me carefully, tucking his inked fingers in his front pockets. He’s clearly interested in whatever’s happening between us.

“What the hell is going on?” he asks as Creed and Zack look at each other like they might come to blows. As if my day isn’t shitty enough, Windsor chooses that moment to walk in. He makes his way right over, grabs me by the arm, and levels one of those fantastic grins of his at the other boys.

“Do you mind if I borrow Marnye here for a moment? Mentoring duties and all that.” He drags me away, and I breathe a sigh of relief as soon as I get out of the room, bending over and putting my palms on my knees for support. Windsor rubs my back in gentle swirling motions. “There, there. I know what it’s like to juggle several girlfriends at once. I recognize the panic on your face.”

“Do not compare me to you,” I whisper, forcing myself to stand up. “I do not have multiple boyfriends. I’m just … juggling my own interests against … other things.” Windsor stares at me for a long moment, hazel eyes mischievous.

“Other things?” he asks coyly, and I can just feel the truth resting on the back of my tongue. What it is about him that makes me want to spill the beans, I’m not sure. It’s infuriating, to be quite honest. “You mean like this mysterious bit of revenge you won’t talk about?”

“Look, I …” I look at Windsor, and I just feel so full of emotion, I want to choke. “I need to get the Idols to go to the graduation getaway with me.” That’s all I have to say, and then it clicks in his mind. I can see the second that it happens. “They bet they could make me fall in love, so …” It sounds pretty freaking lame coming out of my mouth right then.

“I see,” Windsor drawls, tapping at his chin, like all the pieces are falling together. “You’re throwing yourself at those idiots to win a bet?” I nod, and I feel ashamed. I don’t feel like a badass, revenge seeking missile anymore. I feel like Marnye Reed, a girl who’s gotten herself in over her head. I actually like Zack. And I like Creed. I like Zayd, too. And Tristan. They’ve been trying to protect me from the girls all year; I can see it now. It doesn’t make their behavior right, but it does make me want to know more. More about them, their feelings, more about what could happen if I spent more time with them.

“I need to make them fall in love …” I start, and the task feels so monumental that I don’t even know where to begin. I’m running out of time, and my dad’s future is on the line.

“Oh, love,” Windsor says with a chuckle. He pushes his red hair up and off of his forehead. “You know how I’d first guessed you’d fucked?” I nod, warily, but I acknowledge him. “I thought that’s what I was sensing, but I was wrong.”

“Right, because I’ve never … slept with any of them.” I’ve only made Creed come in a hot tub, I think, and I want to choke and then disappear into a hole in the ground. “So what?”

“You’ve already won, you shagging wanker,” Windsor says, shaking his head at me. “If you ask, they’ll go to your party with you. It’s so bloody obvious it’s practically written on the wall.” I gape at him, but he seems so damn sure of himself, it’s hard not to … freak out and feel satisfied at the same time.

“They don’t love me,” I say, and Windsor shrugs, the epaulettes on his jacket wrinkling with the motion.

“They like you enough that they’ll go. Just ask, Marnye. Take them, crush them, win your bet, and then figure out if forgiveness is something you’re interested in.” He frowns briefly. “Although I was looking forward to eating them alive. You will let me help with the rest of your blue-blooded friends however, won’t you?”

I nod, but I’m so speechless, I don’t know what to say.

Windsor grins, puts his arm around my shoulders, and leads me away from The Mess.

“Let’s go get you a drink: you could clearly use one.” I follow along after him, even though I have no intention of consuming any alcohol. Guess I needn’t have worried: as soon as we get to his dorm room, Windsor makes me a cup of tea with milk and two sugars. And he’s right: after I drink it, everything seems just that much clearer to me.

It’s a fine balancing act, keeping up with all of my relationships. And I don’t just mean the ones with the guys, Miranda and Andrew and Lizzie, too. The end of the year academic load is heavy, and I find that I spend most of my time just trying to keep up with my activities, let alone my friendships and my … other entanglements.