He hummed a thoughtful sound under his breath, but obliged my mental pleas by pumping the purple silicone toy in and out of me a few more times.

“Well then,” he murmured, his breath hot on my throbbing pussy. “Remind me to thank her later.”

His weight shifted on the bed, and I craned my neck just in time to see him stroking a fist down his erection. He caught me looking, and just smirked at me before pulling the vibrator out and replacing it with his huge cock.

“Fuck,” I halfway screamed as he slammed the whole way in. He was a clear sight bigger than the toy Eddy had given me, so that first thrust held an edge of pain while my walls stretched and adjusted to accommodate the new intrusion. It was a pain I craved, though, and I writhed under his grip, praying that he’d move.

Beck let out a small, self-satisfied laugh as I whimpered and squirmed, but his hands were tight on my hips—holding me still. “I’m really getting the impression you like it rough, Butterfly.”

“Fuck yes,” I gasped, totally past the point of discretion. “Sebastian, please, please, fuck me hard.”

Thank all the deities and stars and whatever the fuck else, he didn’t require any more encouragement. In fact, he stepped it up a notch by bringing his hand down—open palm—on my ass cheek and making me yell.

Fuck me. What was it about that sharp sting of pain that just drenched my cunt?

Beck fucked me exactly how I wanted him to. Hard, fast, dirty and possessive. When he ran the vibrator over my clit, I exploded in a screaming, thrashing mess.

“Holy fucking shit,” I breathed. “Shit. Holy wow.”

A strangled sort of grunt came from Beck as he held my hips tight and kissed my spine. His cock was still lodged deep within me, and it quickly became clear that he wasn’t finished with me yet.

“You good?” he asked, and I nodded into the pillow. “Good.”

That was all the warning I got before Beck pulled out, flipped me over onto my back and thrust back inside my still pulsing pussy.

I moaned, long and languid as he started moving again. Slower, this time. All my nerve endings were lit up from my intense orgasm, and I draped my arms around his neck in an almost drunken haze.

Beck kissed me while we fucked. Slow and gentle but still with all that dominant ownership that he held in his eyes every time he looked at me.

Except ... we weren’t fucking any more. What he’d done to me doggy style, torturing me with my vibrator and smacking my ass until I came—that was fucking. This...

“Sebastian?” I sighed, loving every inch of skin that touched along our bodies. “Are you...?”

I couldn’t even say the words. Yet another thing for my therapist to handle.

“Making love to you?” he murmured back, smoothing my hair back from my face and meeting my heavy lidded eyes. His face was serious and ... vulnerable. It scared the shit out of me, but at the same time it was as though all my bones has started buzzing with excitement.

“Yeah, baby. Because I think something’s on your mind, and I just want you to know how I feel...” he trailed off, kissing my lips in little, teasing pecks.

My breath caught in my throat, even as my legs curled around his waist, pulling him deeper. “And how is that?” I pushed, despite the near debilitating fear running through me.

A small smile pulled at his lips, and when he replied it was totally without hesitation.

“I love you, Riley.”

The sheer conviction in his voice, the naked honesty on his face ... it was too much.

I panicked, kissing him deeply and continuing to kiss him—preventing any more conversation—until he came inside me. Beck wrapped me in his arms, hugging me tight on just this side of snuggling until I wriggled out of his embrace and gave him a sheepish smile.

“Just going to clean up,” I explained. “Back in a sec.”

Without waiting for a response, I scurried my butt into the bathroom and cranked the shower. But no amount of soap was going to wash away the revelations of the night. Beck loved me. And if I wasn’t such a massive pussy, I could have admitted that I loved him too.

But with all the broken trust and heartache I’d only just started to get over, I wasn’t ready to voice those heavy feelings.

Not yet.

32

It took hardly any time for Beck to fall asleep, and even though my exhausted body kept pushing me to do the same, this was my only chance to escape without any of them knowing. I knew it was stupid. I was well aware I was the fucking moron heroine in the scary movie that deliberately ran away from the highly trained men that cared about her and were trying to protect her. But I was starting to understand that stupid heroine better, especially with my recent situations.

Sometimes the stupid decision was the best one for sanity, and I needed to know about Catherine and Dante. I needed to know before I lost my fucking mind, and since it didn’t appear they were going to let me talk to Dante any time soon, there was only one person who could tell me anything.

Sliding from the bed, I stared down at Beck for a few minutes. Even in sleep there was a coiled lethality about him. I’d have to be very stealthy to even have a chance of getting away; it was only that he was exhausted I even had a shot.

Silently, I opened the drawer and removed the gun and magazine filled with bullets. They slid almost soundlessly together, and I left the room to grab some clothes from my bathroom. Jeans, a hoodie, and my converse was all I needed. Catherine didn’t care if I wore a bra when I confronted her about being a lying bitch of a human.

The last thing was my keys. The butterfly and I were going for a drive tonight. As long as I didn’t wake any of my guard-dudes.

I made it out of my apartment and into the elevator without incident. As the doors were sliding closed, I kept waiting for someone to shout my name and rush forward, but no one did. When I entered the parking lot, I had the gun ready in my hand, and I was on high alert. I hadn’t forgotten about the last assassination attempt.

No one disturbed me, and I got into the butterfly without a problem. I clicked the button to open our automatic gates first, and then I started her up. I really wanted to give her a few minutes to warm up, but the engine was so loud that I was afraid it would somehow alert the guys, so I just carefully backed out and pulled out of the parking lot, closing the gate behind me. It was very early morning, the sun just starting to make itself known to Jefferson, and I was basically the only one on the road. My heart rate picked up as I made my way closer to the Delta estate, and when I pulled into the first set of armed gates, I was sure they could hear the beat from where they stood. “Name?” one said, looking at his sheet and not at me.