I clenched my fists. “Roscoe, try to understand my situation. I love Karly, and I lost her. I never believed there was any way to have her back again. But now I realize she went through something similar to what’s happening to me. It’s not a delusion. She’ll listen to me.”

“Really? How do you think that goes, Dylan? You’re the suspect in the murder of a woman who looks just like her. You told her that your wife died, but pretty soon she’ll discover that your wife is actually alive and you’ve lied to her. You think she’s going to ignore all of that and fall in love with you? You think there’s any way this ends well?”

“Roscoe—”

My friend shook his head with the sharpness of a door closing. “No. I’m sorry, Dylan. You can’t simply undo the choices you regret from another life. That’s not how it works. All you can do is learn from them and become a better man.”

“I’m trying to do that. I swear, I’m trying to change.”

“Change requires sacrifice. Change requires acceptance of your sins. Is that what you’re doing? Or are you still pursuing your own selfish desires? I’m telling you, walk away. Walk away from Karly. If you think you can’t be with Tai, then walk away from this world altogether.”

“You don’t know what you’re asking.”

“I do. Believe me, I do.”

“Roscoe, I came to you as my friend. I need your help.”

“Yes, I know. Believe it or not, help is what I’m giving you. I know you think I should be loyal to you, and I’ve told you many times that I’d always be there for you. But you’ve also made it clear that you’re not the man I know. My friend is dead. Don’t you understand? The longer you stay here, the worse it’s going to get. You are a trespasser, Dylan. You need to leave.”

CHAPTER 23

When I got home, Tai was packing. Grabbing clothes by the handful, she stalked back and forth between our closet and a pink suitcase on the bed. Her long black hair was mussed, her golden face streaked with tears. I stood in the doorway, and she pretended to ignore me, but I could feel the depth of her hurt. Watching her, I knew that Roscoe was right about everything. I’d come to this world and ruined her life. She deserved better.

Her husband, her real husband, was gone. He was dead by the river, and he was never coming back. Meanwhile, the husband who was living in her house was in love with another woman.

“Who is she?” Tai asked, as if she could read my mind.

“What?”

She stopped in the middle of the bedroom and let the dresses she was carrying fall to the floor. “I followed you this morning. I saw you talking to that blond woman at Northwestern. Who is she?”

I hesitated, but there was no point in trying to hide it. “Her name is Karly Chance.”

“Are you having an affair with her?”

“There’s no affair.”

“Don’t lie to me. I saw you. Do you think I can’t read your face? Do you think I haven’t looked for that expression when you stare at me? But I’ve never seen it. Not once. You’ve never looked at me the way you were looking at her.”

“It’s impossible to explain,” I told her. “You wouldn’t believe me if I told you.”

“Save your explanations. I don’t care. I’m leaving. I’m going to stay with a girlfriend.”

“Tai, I’m sorry.”

She shook her head. “No, you’re not. That’s the worst thing. You say the words, but you’re not sorry at all.”

“That’s not true. I hate that I’ve hurt you.”

“Everybody warned me. My family. Roscoe. Hell, even Edgar warned me. They said I was making a mistake by marrying you. I should have listened.”

There was nothing I could say to that.

“Is it love?” Tai went on. “Are you in love with this woman? Or is it something worse?”

“What do you mean?”

“I’m not an idiot, Dylan. I see the resemblance. She looks like the woman who was murdered across the street from us. She looks like the woman you were stalking behind the dorm at Northwestern. What kind of man are you? Who did I marry?”

“You have it all wrong,” I insisted.

“Do I? Well, I guess we’ll see about that. I gave Detective Bushing the clothes you were wearing when you came back on Thursday. I told him to get your DNA and test it. If you killed Betsy Kern, they’ll find out.”

“I don’t care what the test shows. I didn’t kill anyone.”

“In other words, you already know the DNA will match.”

“I’m telling you, this is not what it looks like.”

She started packing again. “Go away, Dylan. Leave me alone. I don’t want to be in the same apartment with you.”

“Tai, please—”

“Go!” she screamed at me. “Get out! If you don’t go, I’ll call 911 and have them drag you out.”

I held up my hands in surrender. “Okay. Whatever you want. I’ll go.”

I left the apartment, because I didn’t want her to get any more upset. She was wrong about me, wrong about who I was and what I’d done, but then again, she wasn’t wrong. No, I wasn’t a killer, but the DNA would probably say that I was. No, I wasn’t having an affair, but I was in love with Karly and would take her back in my arms if I could. I’d been cruel to Tai in this world, but it’s not like I’d been a saint to her in my own world. I’d led her on and told myself it was innocent, because I had no bad intentions. But it wasn’t innocent at all.

After I left the apartment, I took the stairs to Edgar’s place. My grandfather and I didn’t have a great relationship in any world, but I was running out of people to talk to. Roscoe and Tai had both thrown me out. I was feeling increasingly isolated by my mistakes.

Through the door, I heard the blare of a game show on his television. I had a key, so I let myself in. He was asleep in a recliner, his snores blowing like a trumpet. Seeing him like that, alone, gave me a shiver. Despite the six decades between us, I can always see the family resemblance. It’s not just him and me. I can see my father in both of our faces, too. His ghost is never far away.

When I shut off the television, the sudden silence jarred Edgar awake. He blinked with surprise, seeing me sitting on the sofa opposite him.

“You’re up here?” he growled. “Am I dying or something?”

I gave a sad smile. “No.”

“Then what’s going on?”

“I just wanted to see how you were.”

Edgar reached for a warm open can of Budweiser. “You’re going to have to do better than that.”

“Okay. Well, if you want the truth, Tai is downstairs packing. She didn’t want me around.”

“She leaving you?”

“Yes.”

“You cheat on her?”

“It’s complicated. Mostly, I think she just figured out that I wasn’t in love with her.”

Edgar snorted. “I’m pretty sure she knew that from the beginning.”

I thought about the Dylan whose life I’d taken over and the choice he’d made to be with Tai. I still didn’t understand it. “She said you told her not to marry me.”

“That’s right.”

“Sounds like everybody told her the same thing.”

“Yeah, so? Were we wrong?”

“I guess not.”

“So what are you going to do?” Edgar asked.

“What is there to do? She’s leaving.”

“Yeah. Give up. That sounds like you.”

“I don’t love her, Edgar. According to you and Roscoe, I never did. The best thing I can do is let her find someone who really does love her.”

Edgar laughed so hard he nearly spat out his beer. “That’s the best thing? For who, you or her? Aren’t you forgetting something? That girl was nuts about you from the beginning, and I assume she still is. Everyone told her you were damaged goods and she should run away, but she didn’t. That takes some balls, I’ll tell you. It’s not like she didn’t know what she was getting, but she saw something in you that you didn’t see in yourself. I gave her a lot of credit for that. Honestly, I gave you credit, too. I expected you to bail on her, but you stuck it out, at least until now. You worked your butt off to make a life with her, and it seemed to me like it was paying off. This past year, you were as happy as I’d ever seen you.”

I hadn’t heard that word very often in my life. “Happy? Tai made me happy?”

“Sure looked that way to me. I was beginning to think the two of you would go the distance. That would be a first in our family. I screwed things up, and your father—well, we both know about him. But you and Tai seemed to click. Made me glad to see it. I don’t know what the hell happened to ruin that, and I’m not judging anything you did, because I’m sure no angel myself. But it’s a shame. That’s all I’ll say. It’s a shame.”

Edgar’s admonition hit me like a punch to the gut.