Love Online Page 34
My lips ached to kiss hers. Even though I wanted that more than anything, I held back, unsure how she would feel. Hadn’t I sprung enough on her today? Yes, she exhibited a certain level of comfort with me online, but this was the real deal. I couldn’t just assume everything would be the same—she hadn’t chosen this scenario. She hadn’t invited me here. Until I could confirm her feelings, I wasn’t going to assume it was okay to kiss her or touch her. And as of right now, she still seemed a little on edge around me.
“So, Ms. Shortsleeve, I can’t believe you’ve been holding out on your last name.”
“Yeah. That’s me. Thanks a lot, Ollie.” She smiled and just looked at me for a while before she shook her head. “I still can’t believe you’re here, that you found me.”
“Are you happy I’m here?”
Eden nodded. “Yes. Please don’t doubt that.”
Relief ran through me. I reached for her hand, and she looped her fingers in with mine. Even that simple touch caused my dick to stiffen. If this was how it was gonna be, this would be one of the longest weeks of my life—or however long I was staying.
“I really don’t want to…but I have to work tonight,” she said.
Disappointment filled me. “You can’t take the night off?”
“I’ve been off the last couple of nights, remember? I can’t afford to disappear. It’s making me nervous. I’ll lose my clients.”
Never had I understood her need to keep that job the way I did tonight. Now that I saw how much responsibility she had, it was clear why she needed that steady income. It was sure as hell a lot more money than she made waitressing.
“I totally get it, Eden. I’m sorry for not immediately understanding.”
She looked pained. “Believe me, it’s the last thing I want to do tonight.”
It hurt me that she felt forced into it in any way.
“How about this? Why don’t I go to the hotel and let you work. Then tomorrow night, in the early evening, I’ll come back and take you and Ollie out to dinner before you have to start camming.”
Her expression brightened. “That would be awesome.”
“Is there any place in particular he likes to go? I don’t know the area.”
“Yes. There’s this steakhouse that’s cafeteria-style. You can pick what you want from a line-up of choices. He likes to be able to smell the different options before making a decision, since he can’t see what they look like. He loves it. It’s called York’s.”
“No-brainer then. That’s where we’ll go.”
A long moment of silence passed as we looked into each other’s eyes. Being here still felt so surreal. She looked like she wanted to tell me something.
“I know Ollie mentioned Ethan,” she finally said. “He moved to New York.”
“I see. You never mentioned him.”
“I know.” She paused. “He’s one of the reasons I’m very reluctant to get attached to anyone. He got a job there and wanted me to move. I told him I wasn’t willing to uproot Ollie. My brother loves his school, and it really is the right fit for him. Ethan had to decide whether to take the job or stay in Utah with us, and he chose the job. That’s really all there is to that story.”
I nodded. No wonder she was so hesitant about taking things further with me.
“You were with him for how long?”
“A couple of years. He walked into Ellerby’s one day. That’s how I met him.”
“Have you dated anyone since?”
“No. Not a single person in the two years since we’ve broken up.”
“So, you haven’t been with anyone?”
“No, I haven’t.”
“That’s a long time.” I examined her face and could see the scars written all over it. “He really hurt you, didn’t he?”
She took a deep breath. “The breakup with Ethan was my first real heartbreak. We were together for a year and a half. He made me feel protected, although I never expected him to want to take on everything that came along with me. You know? It just sucks when you care about someone, and they don’t choose you. At the same time, I totally understand why he left.”
I felt a tightening in my chest and couldn’t figure out if it was jealousy or anger at him for hurting her and making her think he’d made the right choice by leaving.
“So, you weren’t camming back then, when you were with him?”
“No. Not yet.” She laughed. “He has no clue what I’ve gotten myself into. I haven’t spoken to him in a long time. Sometimes I laugh, thinking about him accidentally finding me.”
“That would serve the fucker right.”
She laughed and looked over at the clock. “Crap. I need to get Ollie to bed and start getting ready. I’m sorry.”
I didn’t want to leave her, but I needed to let her work.