Outmatched Page 45
No. I couldn’t do that. We had undeniable chemistry, but we’d never work in the real world. Not when she couldn’t even introduce me to her family without looking like she was about to throw up.
My smile died, as reality sank like a stone in my gut. We didn’t have a future, but we were partners, and I’d done her wrong in more ways than one. “I shouldn’t have grabbed you like I did. I regret that most of all.”
A frown wrinkled between her brows. “Let me see if I have this straight. You regret … getting physical with me?”
This felt like a trap. My instincts were screaming that it was most definitely a trap. “Yes?”
Her eyes narrowed. “Is that an answer or a question?”
Yep, definitely a trap. Resting my forearms on my thighs, I tried to think of a way to explain myself without digging a deeper hole. “I’m a big guy with a hell of a lot of strength. I didn’t ask for permission, didn’t handle you with care. I just … took.”
She hummed under her breath. I had no idea what that meant, so I forged on, acutely aware that I was probably stepping in it. “I shouldn’t have manhandled you.”
Parker turned away and went back to her post by the window. Afternoon light slanted in and colored her skin bronze. I couldn’t tell if she was pissed, grateful, disappointed, or something else. She’d shut down completely.
I’d have admired her game face if it wasn’t currently being used against me. I stood and rubbed my neck. “It was especially wrong considering we’re just …” I couldn’t say it, though. My mouth refused to do it.
Parker glanced back at me, her brows a fierce line. “Just what?”
The memory of her ashen face when she told her parents that I was her boyfriend flashed in my mind, and the words punched out of me. “Business. We’re just business partners, Parker.”
She made a sound, not quite a snort but close, then tilted her head back to blink up at the ceiling. For a horrible second, I thought she might cry. But then she laughed with a bitterness that surprised me. “You want to hear something funny?”
She sounded so dull and remote, I wasn’t sure if she was asking. I didn’t get to answer before she looked at me again, those deep brown eyes spearing my chest. “You kissing me, me kissing you, the way you touched me on the couch, that was my favorite part of the whole horrible day.”
The floor tipped my feet as heat rushed up my back. “Parker …”
“I’m attracted to you,” she went on, like I hadn’t said a word, her tone growing stronger. “Despite everything, I find myself wanting you. I dread sleeping on that bed with you because I find it exceedingly hard to keep my hands to myself.”
Holy shit. My knees went weak, my dick hard as a pike.
“Which really just … sucks,” she said, growing a little wild and shrill. “Because you keep throwing the truth in my face. That we’re nothing but a deal, a monetary means to an end for both of us. And I feel …” She looked around wildly as though searching for the word, and then it exploded out of her. “Stupid. Fucking stupid!”
God, she was brave. Magnificent. My brave, beautiful girl.
I had to hold her. I needed it. I made a move to go to her, but she thrust up a hand. “No. You don’t get to touch me now.” It was a snarl of rage. “Not when you’ve made it clear how you see me. Not after you’ve been a total dickhead.”
She reveled in cursing, like she gained power from it. I loved that. Watching her rail into me should have left me feeling chastised, but it inflamed me. I was the lucky bastard who was getting to see her bloom.
Slowly, I advanced, holding my hands up in surrender. Because I did. I fucking surrendered. I was hers to do with what she willed.
“I’m not gonna touch you,” I promised when she went stiff. “But let’s clear a few things up. I said that stupid shit about us being nothing more than partners because I thought it’s what I was supposed to say. I was trying to be professional and keep myself under control.”
I stopped in front of her, letting her see all the emotions I’d tried so damn hard to hide. “But there’s nothing controlled about the way I feel about you, Parker. I want you so badly, it hurts.” My hands clenched into fists so I wouldn’t reach for her. “I think about your mouth more than I should. Everything about you gets to me. You dread that bed? Well, so do I. Because being next to you and not being able to touch you is absolute torture.”
Parker swallowed hard and her lips parted. But a small frown worked between her brows. “Is that why you’ve been shutting down on me? Because it doesn’t add up; you were downright angry with me at the party.”
For a second, I didn’t want to answer. I didn’t want to expose that insecurity. But it was still there like a thorn in my side. And this was never going to work if I wasn’t honest with her.
“All right, fine. I was pissed.” I held her gaze. “I knew what you thought of me going into this. I was okay with that because it was a job then. But I figured your opinion of me would change when we got to know each other. Mine did. But yours clearly hasn’t.”
Parker gaped at me as though I’d been speaking in tongues. But then a spark of anger lit her gaze. “How on earth would you come to that conclusion? Because I must say, Rhys, you’re pissing me off now.”
Seriously? I snorted. “Come off it. You looked like you were going to puke all over your penny loafers when your parents showed up. Before that, even. Hell, you practically ran from your parents’ friend too. When it really counts or it’s in front of someone you actually care about, you’re ashamed to be seen with me.”
She didn’t back down. I’d give her that. Her hands went to her hips as she squared off. “I wasn’t ashamed of you! I couldn’t be attracted to someone I didn’t respect and like as a person. I was ashamed of lying to my parents, you complete and utter blockhead!”
Nonplussed, I took a step back like she’d landed an uppercut to my jaw. My ears were ringing. “You … ah … what?”
My brilliant reply only made her nostrils flare.
“Got nothing to say now, huh?” She shook her head with another snort before going on the attack. “My family means everything to me. Did you honestly believe it was easy for me to lie to their faces?”
“Even with that short meeting, I could tell they want the best for you. Why don’t you tell them the truth? You gotta know they’ll forgive you.” I wanted to say more, but my head was reeling. The fact that I’d gotten it so wrong pulled the rug out from under me.
“Because …” She lifted her shoulders in a helpless gesture. “Then I’d have to admit that I’d paid a man to be my boyfriend. And it’s too mortifying to contemplate. Sorry if that offends your delicate sensibilities.”
Delicate?
My lips twitched as tenderness washed through me. “Parker.” I reached for her.
“No …” she said, shaking her head.
“Yes.” Gently I tugged her forward and pressed her palms to where my heart beat hard and fast. “Parker, I’m sorry. I was a dickhead. A blockhead.”
Her gaze slid sideways and a smile ghosted across her lips. She wasn’t pulling away. “You forgot asshole,” she said.