Pucked Over Page 17

“There were only seventy-five. It was small,” Charlene corrects.

“Well, it seemed like three hundred!” Violet huffs. “The whole team is coming to the engagement party! All of them. And they’ve all seen me naked. Or parts of me naked. It’s embarrassing. What if I have another wardrobe malfunction? What if I say something stupid or talk about Alex’s dick, which we all know is highly likely.”

Last year rumors circulated that Alex had gotten caught having sex in the locker room with an unknown girl. The claims were never substantiated. We all know the truth, though; Alex got kicked out of a game, and Violet went to see if he was okay. It was close to the end of the third period. The team walked into the locker room right after they finished, or at least that’s what Sunny told me.

Apparently Miller and Alex almost had it out right there. I’m not much for violence, but I would have paid to see that fight. I did get to see Miller punch Alex out on national TV, and then I saw Alex return the favor in real life, so that’s something.

“Yeah, but you’ve been around them all a ton since then. I’m sure they don’t even remember at this point,” Sunny says.

“Oh, they remember all right. That Kirk guy mentions it every time I see him.”

“Ick. He’s such a pig,” Charlene replies.

“Right?” Sunny shakes her head. “Miller says I’m never supposed to be in a room alone with him.”

“Why would he say that?” I ask. I have no idea who they’re talking about.

“Kirk’s one of the guys on the team. He’s a dirtbag. He’s getting a divorce because he can’t keep his winkie in his pants,” Charlene explains.

“He’s not coming to the engagement party, is he?” Sunny asks.

“Oh, he sure is. Alex didn’t want to invite him, but we couldn’t very well leave him out since the rest of the team is coming.” Violet rubs at a spot on her stomach. “Goddammit! I have hives again. We need to talk about something else.” She points at me. “What’s going on with you and Horny Nut Sac?”

“Who?”

“Randy Balls. Come on. Spill it. He’s clearly had his face in your beaver. Alex is all worried and shit. I’d be jealous if he didn’t constantly refer to you as his ‘other baby sister’ and my rack wasn’t way bigger than yours.”

I protectively cup my pint-sized boobs. Benji always said they were barely there and I’d better get a good job so I could afford to pay for an upgrade. He loved pointing out girls with more cleavage than me. Violet fills out her bikini top in a way I couldn’t even if I wore one of those super-extreme push-up bras. I bought one of those once, and Benji laughed at me. God, he was such a jerk.

“I’m not being mean,” she adds after a moment, probably because I haven’t come up with anything to say. “Just honest. Alex loves boobs so, so much. He tries to use mine as pillows every night. Maybe he got weaned from breastfeeding too early or something. I don’t know. Anyway, what was I talking about? Oh, right. Balls.”

She looks at me expectantly.

“There’s nothing going on.”

“Come on, Lily,” Sunny kicks me in the water.

I sigh. “We messed around. That’s it. It’s not a big deal.”

“Liar face!” Violet shouts. “You are the color of a tomato. How was the sex? I hear you were doing it in the bathroom last night.”

“We didn’t have sex in a bathroom!” I wish I could sink to the bottom of the pool right now. I’m not big on talking about this kind of stuff with anyone but Sunny, let alone people I don’t know all that well. I’m a private person. Except when I’m locked in a bathroom with Randy, apparently.

“I’m not judging. I had sex in a locker room, and all of Alex’s teammates heard my come moans. Everyone needs a little love now and again. Sometimes it’s nice to get laid for the sake of getting laid. Besides, that Benji guy you were with before seems like a real dick. Randy’s a perfect rebound bone: he’s hot, well built, and can probably screw like a stallion.”

Just then, Daisy comes outside in her hot pink bathing suit with huge flowers on it, putting an end to the conversation.

But maybe Violet’s right. I’ve been looking at this all wrong. As long as I’m smart about it, using Randy as a rebound is exactly what me and my boobs need to forget about Benji for good.

Chapter 5

Running in Circles

RANDY

A week after the exhibition game, I’m sitting in a lounge chair close to the pool on Lance’s patio back in Chicago. It’s been unseasonably warm, but today is likely the last time it’s going to be this hot before fall takes me back to jeans and long sleeves. So I’m enjoying the sunshine. Or at least trying to.

Lance invited a bunch of people over. Inevitably, that means bunnies. He’s been better about it lately, but he’s still Lance, so there’s always at least half a dozen hanging around, waiting for someone to throw them a carrot—and by carrot I mean dick.

There’s a girl lying on the chair beside me, yammering away about who-fucking-cares what. She won’t stop talking. The problem isn’t her constant flow of words, which is irritating, but tolerable because I can tune it out. The real issue is that I’ve slept with her before, and based on the way she keeps edging her lounge chair closer to mine, she has it in her mind it’s going to happen again.

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