Not everything. My other hand was shaking violently, and I clenched my fist, trying to calm myself. This was it, the end of the mission. I had to focus. I couldn’t let myself think of those “everything” moments. Slow dancing, surfing on one board, riding the Ferris wheel with her beside me, not wanting to be anywhere else.

Kissing her in the ocean and feeling my entire world stop. Wishing I could be normal, if only to be with her. Because she hadn’t just taught me how to surf and shoot zombies and to scream while plunging down a roller coaster drop. She had shown me how to live.

Ember was still staring at me over the pistol, her gaze defiant. “Go on then,” she whispered, and I saw she was shaking as well. “Shoot me. I’m not telling you where the others are so you can kill them, too.”

Do it. The soldier’s voice returned, and I took a deep breath, straightening my arm. The gun sight hovered at her forehead; it would take only one tiny motion to end this. She’s a dragon, and this is what you were sent for. Why are you hesitating? Kill her, now!

I set my jaw, my finger tightening around the trigger. Ember still watched me, unwavering, but for the first time since I’d known her, I saw a tear slip from her eye, crawling down her face. It gleamed in the moonlight, punching a hole right through my stomach, and the hand that held the gun started to shake.

I…I can’t.

I relaxed, not lowering the pistol, but everything inside me slumped in defeat. I can’t do it. I can’t kill her. Stunned, I stared at her over the weapon, at the girl I knew was a dragon, knew was the enemy.

And I couldn’t kill her.

Dazed, I let my gaze drop, my focus wavering for just a moment.

As Ember moved.

In the split second before I would’ve lowered my arm, the girl lunged, crossing the space between us in a blink. My attention jerked immediately to the danger, but by that time, Ember hit my arm from below, forcing my wrist and the pistol skyward, wrenching it from my grip. Stunned, my body still reacted on instinct, even when my mind was elsewhere. As the weapon was stripped from my grasp, I lashed out with a kick, striking the hand that held the gun as Ember drew back. The pistol was hurled away, skittering over the rocks, and came to rest a few feet from the edge of the cliff.

Unarmed, Ember backed up, eyes glowing with an eerie, ominous light. I saw the air around her ripple, felt the shift of energy between us, and spun, hurling myself at my weapon. Behind me, there was a soundless explosion, an enraged snarl rang out, turning my blood to ice. Diving for the edge of the cliff, I snatched up the gun, whirled around—

—and felt the breath explode from my lungs as something big and red slammed into me, knocking me off my feet. I hit the ground on my back, seeing snarling fangs, wings, and crimson scales fill my vision, and brought the gun up for one last, desperate shot.

A clawed foot hit my elbow, forcing it to the ground. another struck my chest, sinking curved talons into my shirt, as five hundred pounds of hissing, furious red dragon landed on me, pinning me down. Hot wind blasted me, whipping at my hair, as the monster bared its fangs and roared in my face.

I slumped, the gun dropping from my nerveless fingers. I couldn’t move; the dragon had my weapon arm pinned, its whole weight pressing me down. I could feel its claws pricking my chest through my shirt, though they hadn’t sunk in all the way. Its breath fanned over my face, smelling of smoke and ash, and the narrow jaw, filled with lethal, razor sharp teeth, hovered inches from my throat. Briefly, I wondered how it would kill me. Would it rip me apart, sink those claws into my chest, tear out my throat? Or would those jaws open all the way and blast me with dragonfire?

But the dragon didn’t do any of those things. I’d been holding my breath, waiting for the pain of being torn apart or incinerated, but it only stood there, front claws pinning me down, just watching. As if it couldn’t decide what to do with me. I looked up, past the jaws and teeth and flaring nostrils, and met its gaze.

Its eyes were the same emerald green, bright and intense, though they were slitted and reptilian now. Very inhuman. Its wings were flared to either side for balance, leathery membranes casting a dark shadow over us both.

“What are you waiting for?” I gritted out, making the dragon blink. I sucked in a breath, my lungs flattened and abused from the huge creature on top of them. I wanted this done. I’d lost this battle, and the price for failure was death, like everyone in the Order. Fate, it seemed, had finally caught up. “Stop toying with me,” I panted, glaring at the creature overhead. “Just get it over with.”

The dragon’s eyes narrowed. Shifting its weight, it drew its muzzle back, nostrils flaring, and I turned my head, bracing myself for the sheet of dragonfire, hoping it would be quick.

The dragon’s head snaked forward, and I flinched despite myself.

But those deadly jaws went for my arm, for the hand that once held the gun, and closed over the muzzle of the pistol. Raising its head, the dragon gave an almost disgusted snort and hurled the gun away, where it sailed over the railings, glinted once in the moonlight, and dropped into the ocean far below.

As I watched my weapon vanish over the edge of the cliff, the weight on my chest and arm disappeared. The dragon reared onto its hindquarters, flaring its wings, and backed away. Stunned, I levered myself to my elbows, watching it retreat, wondering if this was some sort of trick. If it was just toying with me further.

The dragon closed its eyes. Its form shimmered, rippled like a mirage, and began to shrink. It grew smaller and smaller, wings disappearing, scales and claws melting away, until I was staring at Ember once more. She wore a dark suit that hugged her body like a second skin, outlining her deceitfully slender form. Her green eyes shone as she gazed down at me.

I didn’t move. I was unarmed, and the slight girl standing over me was just as dangerous as she had been a moment ago. It would take half a second for her to pounce on me again and tear me apart. but she didn’t move either, just continued to watch me with sad, angry green eyes, and slowly, my muscles began to unclench. The thought was ludicrous but…it seemed this dragon, the target I’d been sent to kill, the girl I’d pursued with the intent to destroy, was going to let me go.

No, the perfect soldier protested. Don’t believe it. That’s insane.

Dragons don’t show mercy, not to us. But what else could I believe?

I’d been helpless a second ago, pinned under a creature three times my weight. One breath, one slash, would’ve ended my life. I didn’t know why she hadn’t. I was a soldier of St. George. She should have killed me just for that.