Sighing, I lift up his paw and just like she said, he falls back to his hind legs as I give it a quick shake and say, “I’m Maddox, don’t shit in my apartment.”

“Can you please not swear in front of Herman? He’s dignified. I’m pretty sure he has a monocle somewhere but he keeps hiding it from me.”

Another thing about Kinsley and animals: she becomes delusional. She creates these human thoughts of them in her head, where they actually act and do human-like things . . . like a bloodhound wearing a monocle. Then she’ll laugh about the thought for a while. Little crazy, but also weirdly endearing.

I give him another pat and then scratch him behind his ear before standing. Kinsley joins me and she quickly pulls me into a hug, pressing her head against my chest. Hell, if this is the kind of reaction I’m going to—

“Can you please take him out to go to the bathroom? I need to shower.” And before I can respond, she skips down the hallway and shuts the bedroom door.

You’ve got to be fucking kidding me.

This would be hilarious if it was anyone else.

But it’s me.

So it’s not fucking funny.

Instead of going to the bathroom like a good dog would when he sees a green patch of grass, Herman sits next to it and people-watches, observing people walking by, his head slowly moving back and forth as he observes. And if I were Kinsley, I’d say he’s looking for his owner. It really does look that way, but I’m not going to say that out loud.

I’ve given up at this point and have taken a seat on the bench next to Herman to contemplate the ramifications of me saying yes to letting this dog stay with us. Within minutes of agreeing to the new roommate, I’m already sitting here, waiting for him to “make.”

“You’re lucky she loves you, you realize that?” I say to Herman who, ever so slowly, turns his head to look at me. Giant brown eyes rimmed in black stare back at me. Massive wrinkles in his forehead make him look so goddamn pathetic, it’s hard to even be mad at the guy for flipping my life upside down today.

“And you’re lucky I love her, otherwise you’d be on your way back to the shelter right about now.” I shake my head. “Can’t say no to her when she looks at me with those teary eyes. Takes me back to our childhood, when she begged me to help a stray. I always ended up helping someway, even if it meant sleeping in a shed with a cow.” I drag my hand over my face. “Fuck, she has me wrapped around her pinky and she doesn’t even know it. She has no fucking clue how I feel about her.”

Herman makes a small noise as he stares at me. “You know, don’t you? You can see it, the way I look at her, long for her, beg for her to hold me a little bit longer.” I breathe out a long breath. “Shit, I’m just as pathetic as you, but maybe even worse.”

I pat him on the head and he moves until his head is resting on my leg. Figures.

“I have to say, you earned your residency in my apartment, and you didn’t even have to do anything.” I stroke his ear. “She kissed me, man. On the lips.” Dreamily I stare up at my building. “She’s never done that before and it was . . . fuck, it felt amazing. I wanted more, so much more, but I don’t think she’s there. I don’t think the kiss on the lips meant anything to her, like it meant the whole world to me.” Herman’s eyes are soft, kind, and he makes it oddly easy to talk to him. “I’m not sure if she wants more with me to be honest, but I know I need more.” I pat his head. “If you help me score the girl, I might actually be okay with you staying in my apartment . . . as long as you don’t shit in it.”

I give him a stern eye and then stand from the bench. I tug on his leash and he tugs back, only to lift one leg and pee on the unsuspecting tree right next to him. While staring at me. Intently. I shudder.

Maybe all he needed was the talk.

Kinsley sits cross-legged on the bed, a giant smile on her face, as she watches me get ready for the night. She’s already showered and ready so is now waiting for me. It’s cute.

Really fucking cute, seeing her in her tank top and matching shorts.

She’s always been beautiful to me. Special. And as she’s grown into the woman she is today, I realize, she’s even more beautiful than ever. It’s not just her looks, because yes, she’s fucking hot with her platinum-blonde wavy hair, ice-blue eyes, and full pink lips. Her personality . . . her heart. That makes her positively stunning in my eyes.

I spit my toothpaste in the sink and then rinse my mouth and wipe it with a hand towel. I switch off the light and walk toward her in just my briefs, catching her studying my torso for a few beats before her eyes meet mine again.

What I wouldn’t give right now to have her slowly peel off that tank top and straddle me. I wouldn’t even have to go all the way with her, but to feel her skin on mine, to experience her tight nipples rubbing against my hard chest, to know what it feels like to have her straddle my lap and slowly move over my erection back and forth, back and forth until we’re both gasping for air and climaxing at the same time.

Fuck, the image is so vivid in my head that I have to think of something else quickly before I embarrass myself.

“How do you like the new toothpaste?”

Jesus, that’s what she’s thinking about? Here I am, perverted thoughts of her half-naked on my lap, and she wants to know how the new toothpaste is? If this is what I’m dealing with when it comes to her feelings versus my feelings, I’m totally fucked.

“It’s good.” I swallow back my feelings. “I don’t mind it.”

“Really?” She claps. “That’s so exciting. Do you think you’ll use it from now on?”

I shrug. “Sure. If I can remember to order.”

“I can set you up with a subscription so you won’t even have to worry about it. They’ll just come in the mail.”

I get under the covers while she still sits on top of them.

“Do you realize how huge this is, Maddox? If we all make changes like this, we can make a significant difference for future generations. Did you know it takes five hundred years for a toothpaste tube to decompose? And the average family goes through one tube a month.” She’s getting even more excited now. “That’s a lot of tubes, Maddox.” I don’t have to glance down to see that her nipples are taut and pushing against the stretchy fabric of her tank top. Little nubs that I want to pull between my teeth. “. . . and these jars are completely recyclable, so if we all switch to these—” She crosses her arms over her chest. “Maddox, are you paying attention?”

“Hmm?” I ask lazily as my eyes focus on her.

“Oh my God.” She huffs and crawls across the bed to her side, her pert little ass shaking back and forth with her retreat. What would she do if I spanked her? Moan? Look at me in shock? Ask for more?

Or smack me back?

I chuckle thinking about the latter.

“What’s so funny?”

“Nothing.” I shake my head.

“Well, clearly something is funny enough to distract you from my tirade about toothpaste tubes.”

I roll my head to the side and catch the crease in her brow. I lift my hand and press my fingertips to her forehead, flattening the wrinkle. “I love you, Kin, but you talk a lot about recycling. I’m bound to tune you out at some point.”

She smacks my hand away. “Hey, someone has to talk about it or no one is going to ever care to make a change.”

“You’re changing me, babe, one bamboo toothbrush at a time. Save your breath.”

“Never.” She looks out toward the hallway and bites on the inside of her cheek. I know exactly what she’s going to say before she even says it just from that one little look.

“No.”

“No, what?” she asks, looking a little surprised.

“Herman is not sleeping with us.”

“But what if he’s scared?”

“He’s fine. He has his bed. We left a night light on for him. He has one of my shirts and one of your shirts near him that we weirdly rubbed all over our bodies for scent, a blanket from his old home, and you sang him a good-night song.”

“I think if you chimed in with backup, it would have helped.” Yeah, that isn’t fucking happening.

I shift in bed and turn off the nightstand light. I turn to face her and catch her still sitting up, arms crossed, staring down the hallway.

“Kinsley, he’s fine,” I say, drawing out fine. “Lie down.”

“But—”

“He’s staying here, isn’t he? He’s not with the other barking dogs? I allowed him to stay despite my number-one rule. Can’t that be enough for now? You can’t push me too much, Kinny,” I say, speaking my truth.

And she listens, because she scoots down under the covers and faces me as well, both of us using our pillows to prop us up ever so slightly so we can see each other.

“Am I pushing you?”

I reach out and take her hand in mine, entwining our fingers together. “It’s just a lot, okay? I love how you want to change the world, it’s one of my favorite things about you, but I’m also used to a certain way of living, and it does not include a three-legged bloodhound sleeping in my room.”

She nods. “I get it. I’m sorry.”

With our connected hands, I tip her chin up. “I appreciate you trying to help me be a better person.”