It is a statement, but he poses it like a question, rising in intonation at the end. In light of this, I decide to go out on a limb and answer it as one. “Sure. Talk to you later.”

Wally gives me a little salute and lets himself out with his shoes still in his hand. It’s so peculiar I find I can’t stop smiling.

I look back at Rose, who is gaping at me.

“He slept here? Fern! You can’t just invite a strange man into your home!”

“He’s not that strange.” I wonder if she is referring to the salute.

“He’s a stranger, Fern. We don’t know him. Is he the one who drove you home the other night after bowling?”

I nod. “In his van.”

“That’s another thing,” Rose says. “I saw Mrs. Hazelbury on the way in and she’s not happy about that caravan outside.”

“It’s not a caravan,” I say. “It’s a kombi van—”

But Rose isn’t listening. “What did you say his name was again? Rocco?”

“Yes. But I call him Wally.”

“What’s his last name?”

“Ryan.”

“Rocco Ryan.” Rose frowns frustratedly off into the distance, contemplating that.

“You still didn’t tell me why you came back from your holiday early! Is everything all right with Owen?”

A tiny smile comes to her lips. “Everything is perfect with Owen. We’re back together!”

Rose is beaming. I get the feeling that I should be excited. But I’m confused.

“Back together? But … did you break up?”

“Well … no.” Rose’s smile fades. “It’s complicated. Suffice to say, I have been worried about the state of our relationship these last few months. But not anymore.” Her smile returns. “Now, I’m more confident about it than ever.”

I smile, still not totally understanding.

“So, where is Owen?” I ask. “Back at your place?”

She shakes her head. “He’s got to finish the project he’s working on. But he’ll be back as soon as he can. In the meantime, we need some serious sister time. Just you and me, and these donuts. What do you say?”

She dives into the box and pulls out a chocolate-iced donut for me. She has one too, after checking her blood sugar on her glucometer. When we are done, I shower and get ready, and then Rose drives me to the library. It’s not until much later that day that I realize that Rose never actually explained why she was home early.

JOURNAL OF ROSE INGRID CASTLE

It wasn’t easy leaving Owen. But if there was even a chance that Fern was in danger, it was worth it. It sounds dramatic, I realize that. Just because she’d met a guy didn’t mean she was in danger. But the statistics in this area are grim. Ninety percent of all people with intellectual disabilities will be sexually assaulted in their life. Ninety percent!!! Call me overprotective, but I’m going to make damn sure that my sister is going to be among the ten percent.

I have to admit, it’s helpful, journaling all of this. And my therapist is right, the subconscious has a funny way of connecting things. Joy connects to fear. Good connects to bad. And so, on a day when I’m feeling good about my decision to come home, guess who I find myself thinking about?

Gary.

Gary was Mum’s boyfriend when we were eleven. Mum’s first boyfriend, or at least the first we knew about, after Dad left. Gary was a welcome addition to our lives at first. A novelty, you might say. He was a PE teacher. He wore shorts and trainers every single day, even on the weekends. I remember wondering if he even owned other clothes. The best thing about Gary was that when he was around, Mum was nicer.

Gary was affectionate—which was also a novelty. He used to give us bear hugs and shoulder rubs. It was strange, being touched in this way by an adult. Sometimes I liked it, but most of the time it confused me. One time, as we all sat in front of the television, he picked up my legs and began to massage them. I wanted to ask him to stop, but Mum was there and she didn’t say anything, so I didn’t either. He tried it with Fern next, but she told him to stop. Fern could always get away with those things better than I could.

One day, Gary took us swimming while Mum was getting her hair done. Fern and I were excited. I don’t know if it was the swimming or just the idea of doing something so normal that intoxicated me. Fern loved the water. When we arrived at the local council pool, she dived into the open section away from the lanes and paddled away immediately. I wasn’t as good a swimmer as Fern, and I got into the pool slowly and stayed close to the shallow end. Gary sat on the side the whole time, watching. When I ventured toward the deep end, he called me back.

“I promised your mum I wouldn’t let you drown,” he said, sliding off the edge and into the pool. I still remember his arms circling my waist under the water and pulling me against him. I remember his bare thighs pressing against mine. And I remember the distinct feeling that something wasn’t right about it.

“Relax,” he whispered. “Just relax.”

It was the strangest thing. There were people everywhere, all around us. And yet I was entirely alone.

FERN

Rose gets me to work on time (just). After all the excitement of her surprise return, it is a relief that my morning at the library is uneventful. The afternoon, however, is another story.

I am in the children’s corner reading to a child who has refused to take part in the school holiday singing and dancing group (Too loud, she’d said, and I quite agreed) when I hear a shout from the other side of the library.

“Get. Out. Of. My. Face.”

The little girl looks up at me worriedly. I share her concern. The voice is deep and guttural and doesn’t sound friendly. It’s most unusual to hear a voice like this in the library.

“Stand back! Get the fuck away from me!”

I get to my feet to try to locate its owner. I see a large man towering over Carmel. Carmel looks uncharacteristically unsure of herself. She holds out both palms toward him in a surrender gesture, but he doesn’t appear to be backing off.

I scan the area around them. A few people quietly vacate their computers, gathering in small groups closer to the door. Gayle watches from the front desk, her ear pressed to the phone. I cross the floor quickly to stand beside Carmel. Up close, I can see the man is shaking and sweating. He appears to be in quite the state.