Oh, God.

My vision blurred, and I quickly wiped at my tears before more could fall. I looked around, desperate to focus on anything but the bond that had been unintentionally forged between my son and my enemy. I blamed Angel. I blamed myself.

How could we have let this happen?

I was grateful the room was dark even if there was no one around to witness as I broke apart. Because I didn’t know what else to do, I took a seat by his bedside and waited. Caylen’s eyelids eventually grew heavy with sleep. He curled against Angel’s side, leaving me alone with my thoughts. My fingers itched to draw them, but as heart-wrenchingly beautiful as they looked together, I didn’t want to keep the memory. It would have only been a reminder that Angel had taken my soul.

Unable to deny the resentment burning in my heart any longer, I scooted closer and bent low until my lips were level with his ear. He might have been in a drug-induced sleep, but it didn’t stop me from saying, “You were supposed to die.” My woeful whisper was drowned by the steady beeping of the machines surrounding him. I watched his chest move with each breath he took as he slept. “I’m not sorry for what I did…” I’d always believed Angel was larger than life—someone who couldn’t be hurt or killed. He was always so fast, so strong, so cunning. Until I almost made him a corpse. “It’s not fair that it hurts me to see you like this.” He was the one who betrayed me. “The pain is deeper than even you could have caused. It’s not fair.”

I shoved my hands under my thighs to keep from touching him and closed my eyes to hide my unshed tears even though we were alone. I wanted to kiss his lips and watch him come to life, but I kept my kisses. After all, this wasn’t a fairy tale.

“His doctor says he’ll be out for a while.” The sound of Lucas’s voice jarred me. Twisting to look behind me, I found him leaning a powerful shoulder against the door. “But I’m sure if the sound of your voice could numb the pain better than any drug.” His eyes bore into me from across the room. The chill in his gaze couldn’t be mistaken.

“I’ve said all I have to say to him.”

“Are you sure?”

“Do you have a suggestion?” I shot back.

His smile was chilling. “I don’t care to meddle in a lover’s quarrel.”

Wisely, I didn’t take his bait, although I was pretty sure not doing so implicated me just as well. I hadn’t admitted the truth to him, but I didn’t call him a fool, either.

“I don’t know what you mean,” I attempted too late.

“Funny,” he popped a stick of gum in his mouth, “I think you do.”

“Can I help you with something?”

“It’s been a couple of hours. I came to see if Caylen needed anything.”

Caylen. Not me.

I used the moment to turn away and stroked my fingers through the soft wisps of Caylen’s hair. “He’s fine.”

“And you?” he questioned after a brief pause.

“I’m fine, too.” I kept my tone level and my gaze from straying away from my son. It worked for only a moment. I couldn’t stop my head from turning, but it didn’t matter. He was gone.

I glared at the spot he had abandoned and dug my fingernails deep into the meat of my thigh. Lucas and I could never be friends, and now I knew why. He was too much like Angel. But Lucas and I didn’t share a burning desire to own the other completely. It would be a lie to deny Lucas was sexy as hell. He’d also expressed with his eyes, mouth, and hands that he wouldn’t mind fucking me… but he wasn’t Angel, and that made his arrogance and dominant personality intolerable.

It was becoming clear that Lucas suspected something. Could he know it was me who stabbed Angel? I shook the thought off as soon as it formed. If Lucas was sure I had tried to kill Angel, he wouldn’t have let me near him. He would have killed me by now or locked me in a place where I’d never see daylight again.

Either way, I had to be careful. I may not be locked behind a door anymore, but I was far from free.

Lucas didn’t wait long to return. This time, he chose to sit quietly in the corner. I had lasted five minutes before his scrutiny got the better of me, and I left Angel’s room in search of fresh air. I left Caylen napping by Angel’s side because, even though Lucas didn’t trust me, I knew he would keep my son safe.

I pushed through the double doors and headed for the elevator. I was too distracted to notice them at first as I neared the end of the hall.