Being in a house without parental scrutiny was new for them. They had often made out in Jackie’s bedroom or in the woods behind his house, but they couldn’t explore each other as they wanted in those places. On Valentine’s Day, in Jackie’s car, they had talked about sex but decided they didn’t want their first time to be in a car. That night, Jackie had told her he’d never done it. He said she was the only girl he’d ever wanted to be with that way.

The freedom of being alone changed everything. Jackie took off her shirt and pants. She took off his. They had only their underwear between them. She felt the soft duvet beneath her, his warm skin on hers, and the fire’s heat dancing around them.

Jackie leaned over her, his dark hair falling onto his forehead. How beautiful he was, his hazel eyes flashing with reflected flames.

“Do you want to?” he asked.

“Yes,” she said.

“Me too. But I have to go out to my car.”

“To get a condom?”

“There are still some in the glove box from Huck.”

“You don’t need that.”

He looked stunned. “You’re on birth control?”

“My body can’t make a baby.”

“Why not?”

After a few seconds of thought, she said, “Because I was born different.”

“Raven, I’m so sorry!”

He truly was. She saw it in his eyes. She wished she could tell him the truth, that she might have a baby one day when she asked for one with all her heart and soul.

“I don’t mind,” she said. “It’s no big deal.”

She’d spoiled the mood. He now looked at her more with concern and sympathy than desire.

“Does it change how you think of me?” she asked.

He put his hand on her cheek, his gaze softened. “No. Not at all. I love you the same.”

“It makes things a lot easier, doesn’t it?”

“Definitely.”

She sat up and slid off her bra.

He refocused on the topic at hand. He guided her down and kissed her. “Who gets to be on top?” he asked.

“Both of us,” she said.

“Is that physically possible?”

“You didn’t think we’d only do it once, did you?”

10

Mama was right about the creature joy of sex. It was like lapping icy water straight from a Montana mountain stream when she was thirsty. It was a kind of satiation in the most beautiful of ways.

But making love with Jackie was much more than simple gratification. Because of what she felt for him. With Chris, her raven side had stood apart. With Jackie, she and her spiritual side were one. Her raven fully trusted Jackie’s gentle soul. And her human side, of course, loved him body and soul.

They wished spring break would never end. They spent as much time together as they could. Ms. Danner knew Raven’s mother was away, but she didn’t know how many hours Jackie was in Raven’s home and walking the acreage with her. She wouldn’t have allowed it. She’d barely agreed to the unsupervised party for Reece.

Sunday, the last day of vacation, was warm and sunny with a delicious taste of spring in the air. Jackie came over at noon after he did a few chores for his mother. They made a picnic lunch and headed for the stream. Jackie wanted to make love there, at the place where they had met.

“You’re quite the romantic,” she said when he suggested it.

“I am, but don’t tell anyone,” he said.

When they arrived at the stream, Raven spread out a blanket. “This is exactly where I was standing when we first saw each other.”

They ate lunch. They made love. They lay wrapped together watching clouds billow.

“The anniversary of my dad’s accident is next week,” he said. “Maybe you could come over that day.”

“Of course,” she said. “What would you like to do?”

“We need to be with my mom. Huck will be at school, and I think three will feel less lonely than two. Will that be okay?”

“Yes, of course.” She swept his hair off his forehead and kissed him there.

“One year since I last talked to him. Sometimes it seems longer, sometimes like the accident just happened yesterday.”

“Everyone loved him. He was a good man.”

Jackie leaned over her, tears in his eyes. “Do you remember at the burial, what you said?”

She remembered very well.

“You put your hand on my heart and said something like, ‘I give you the strength of my spirit.’ You said you loved me.”

“Were you upset?”

“What? No! That was bullshit how everyone got angry with you! It made me realize how empty most of my relationships were. You were the only person other than my mom who ever made me feel better.”

He looked as serious as she’d ever seen him. “I changed because of what you did. I broke up with Sadie because she kept bad-mouthing you. And I quit hanging out with anyone who treated you like that. I realized that day that you were the only girl I wanted to be with.”

“You did?”

“Didn’t you see how much more attention I gave you? But you were so different when you came back from Montana. I didn’t think I’d ever get to be with you.”