The Maidens Page 50
But that night, as she lay in bed and shut her eyes – a face appeared in her mind. Not the face of Sebastian, or her father’s face – but the face of a little girl.
A small, frightened girl of six.
Zoe’s face.
What happened to her? What had been done to that child? What did she endure – right under Mariana’s nose – in the shadows, in the wings, just behind the scenes?
Mariana had failed Zoe. She had failed to protect her – she had failed even to see – and she must take responsibility for that.
How had she been so blind? She needed to know. She had to understand. She had to confront it. She had to face it—
Or she would go mad.
Which is why, one snowy February morning, Mariana ended up making her way to North London, to Edgware hospital – and to the Grove. Theo was waiting for her in the reception. He greeted her warmly.
‘I never thought I’d see you here,’ he said. ‘Funny, the way things turn out.’
‘Yes, I suppose it is.’
Theo led her through security and along the dilapidated corridors of the unit. As they walked, he warned Mariana that Zoe would be distinctly different from when she last saw her.
‘Zoe’s extremely unwell, Mariana. You’ll find her quite changed. I think you should prepare yourself.’
‘I see.’
‘I’m so glad you came. It will really help. She speaks of you often, you know. She frequently requests to see you.’
Mariana didn’t reply. Theo gave her a sidelong look.
‘Look, I know this can’t be easy,’ he said. ‘I don’t expect you to feel in any way benign towards her.’
I don’t, Mariana thought.
Theo seemed to read her mind. He nodded. ‘I understand. I know she tried to hurt you.’
‘She tried to kill me, Theo.’
‘I don’t think it’s quite that simple, Mariana.’ Theo hesitated. ‘He tried to kill you. She was merely his proxy. His puppet. She was entirely controlled by him. But that was only part of her, you know – in another part of her mind, she still loves you – and needs you.’
Mariana was feeling increasingly apprehensive. Coming here had been a mistake. She wasn’t ready to see Zoe; wasn’t ready for how it would make her feel – and what she might say, or do.
As they reached his office, Theo nodded at another door at the end of the corridor.
‘Zoe’s in the recreation room, through there. She doesn’t tend to socialise with the others, but we always make her join them during free periods.’ He glanced at his watch and frowned. ‘I’m so sorry – but would you mind waiting a couple of minutes? There’s another patient I must see in my office for a moment. Then I’ll facilitate a meeting between you and Zoe.’
Before Mariana could reply, Theo gestured at the long wooden bench against the wall outside his office. ‘Won’t you sit down?’
Mariana nodded. ‘Thanks.’
Theo opened his office door. And through the open doorway, Mariana glimpsed a beautiful, red-haired woman sitting, waiting, staring through the barred window, at the grey sky outside. The woman turned and looked warily at Theo as he entered the room and shut the door behind him.
Mariana glanced at the bench. But she didn’t sit down. Instead, she kept going. She walked up to the door at the end of the corridor.
She stopped outside it. She hesitated.
Then she reached out, turned the handle—
And went inside.