Ansel smiled at him, empty and cold. “Congratulations, man. You’re the wolf that I’m not. She made you for herself and left us behind.”

“That’s not how it happened. Ansel, they were going to kill him!” My eyes burned, tears spilling down my cheeks.

“Better him than us,” he said, staring at the floor again. “The whole pack will be dead soon enough.”

“No,” I whispered. They wouldn’t, would they? Kill the young wolves? All of them? My mind reeled, screaming against the possibility. The Keepers had executed Guardians for revolts in the past. Had I sealed that fate for my packmates when I ran?

Monroe was suddenly beside us, resting his hands on Ansel’s shoulders.

“Listen carefully. We can help you and your friends, but you must tell me the truth. Were you followed?”

Ansel’s eyes rolled up and he spat in Monroe’s face.

Adne gasped, but Monroe held up his hand.

“I understand you’re in pain,” he said quietly, but without anger. “But I need you to trust me. We aren’t your enemies. Your sister is safe here. You will be too.”

I could hardly breathe. Tears still ran down my face, dripping from my jaw onto my collarbone. What had I done? Faces swirled before my closed eyes. Bryn. Mason. Ren.

I felt a hand on mine. “Calla,” Shay murmured. “It’s not your—”

“Don’t.” I jerked my fingers away from his. “It is my fault.”

Ansel drew a long shuddering breath. “They threw me out of a van downtown. They just said I’d find my sister if I was lucky.”

“Ethan?” Monroe was on his feet.

“He was alone,” Ethan said. “No trackers. No Guardians.”

“He’s probably just a warning,” Connor said. “It’s the sort of thing they like to do.”

Adne shuddered and Connor put his arm around her shoulders.

“You’re likely right,” Monroe said.

Adne stepped forward. “We should get him cleaned up. I can find some clothes.”

“I just want to be left alone,” Ansel muttered, but the rage was gone from his voice.

I crawled to his side.

“Let them help, An. They really can help us.”

“I shouldn’t have said those things to you.” He shivered, finally looking at me, eyes glassy and brimming with grief. “I’m glad you’re not dead.”

I laughed through my own tears. “Thanks.”

“Why did you leave us?”

“I couldn’t let Shay die. I just couldn’t,” I choked. “I didn’t want to leave you. I’m so sorry.”

He leaned his head against my shoulder, shivering when I put my arm around him. “So am I.”

FOURTEEN

WE GATHERED AT Purgatory’s kitchen table. Silas and Adne set steaming mugs of tea before us. No longer caked in blood and grime, wearing clothes that Adne had scrounged up, Ansel looked himself again. Almost. His face remained a shadow of the one I remembered, and he shivered even under the blanket wrapped around his shoulders. My brother had always glowed with optimism, a smile constantly twitching at the corners of his lips. Now his features were drawn. His eyes, half hidden by the fall of his sand brown hair, were distant and dull.

I sat across from him, watching his every move, wondering what he was thinking, if he was in pain. I’d tried to sit closer to him, but he’d shifted his chair farther away. It was as though he couldn’t tolerate my presence.

He wasn’t a wolf any longer. I understood the weight of that loss. Wolves were who we’d always been. To live without that part of myself would be . . . impossible. I would be lost in the world. But why won’t he be near me? I know it isn’t his fault. Is he ashamed? Is he afraid of me?

Ansel had been thrown not to the wolves, but from them. Abandoned like refuse in the street, no longer useful to his masters.

We sat quietly, waiting for him to answer the question Monroe had just asked.

He didn’t move, fingers clasping the mug in front of him.

Monroe cleared his throat. “I know it’s difficult, but you need to tell us what happened after Calla and Shay left Vail.”

Ansel pushed his mug away, hiding his shaking hands beneath the table.

“We were waiting for her in the clearing.”

I closed my eyes, suddenly back in the forest. I heard the drums, Sabine and Nev singing. I remembered catching Shay’s scent, finding him bound and blindfolded. My heart began to pound in my chest, matching the memory of the fierce drumbeats.

“But she never came.” Ansel’s voice pierced the fog of images and I opened my eyes to find him staring at me.

“She found me,” Shay said. “I’d been kidnapped. They had me tied up, waiting to be sacrificed in that ceremony.”

“Interesting,” Silas murmured.

“That’s not interesting,” Connor snapped. “It’s sick.”

“What are you even doing here?” I bared my fangs at Silas. “Aren’t you just a paper pusher?”

“That’s my girl.” Connor smiled.

“Scribes coordinate all intelligence from the outposts,” Silas said, puffing his chest. “We lost a key operative today; this boy might be able to tell us how that happened.”

He raised an eyebrow at Ansel, but Ansel just stared blankly at the tabletop.

Silas cleared his throat, looking to Shay. “Tell us about the sacrifice. Was there any ritual preparation involved?”