I look at my phone and see the read receipts notification on the Kakao message, but Akari’s reply doesn’t come. I sigh, chewing on my lower lip. Maybe she’s mad at me for not making more time for her lately. I’ll have to make it up to her in some way.

“Rachel, this just came for you.” Mr. Han appears by my side, holding a pink cardboard box tied with a glittery ribbon. He smiles knowingly. “Someone had it delivered to the dressing room.”

For me?

I take the box, curiously untying the ribbon and opening the lid. Inside, a row of pale-pink frosted doughnuts in the shape of letters spells out GOOD LUCK, with an extra heart-shaped doughnut at the end.

A bubble of laughter bursts from my lips. Jason. The promposal. I can’t believe he remembered.

“Who’s that from?”

I clutch it closer to me as Mina peers over.

“I don’t know,” I lie.

She narrows her eyes suspiciously. A few of the trainers and execs are also staring at me with questioning looks. Jaehyun, our dance trainer, raises his eyebrows and says, “That’s cute, Rachel.” He comes over and peers inside the box. “Is that a… heart?”

For the millionth time in the last few weeks, Kang Jina’s words spring to my mind. Despite all the conflicting thoughts swimming around my brain, a nervous pit starts to form in the bottom of my stomach. I’m about to go onstage and sing with Jason. I’m about to make a music video with Korea’s most popular K-pop star. Now is not the time to give any of the trainers—or anyone at DB—a reason to doubt me. Not when I’m so close to my goal. The goose bumps on my skin fade away, replaced by a deep flush that stretches from my face down to my feet.

Shit, shit, shit. What do I say?

“They’re from me,” a voice says. I turn my head to see Akari walk into the room, a breezy smile on her face. “A good-luck present for my best friend.”

The execs and trainers relax, their smiles brightening and the suspicion fading from their faces. Mina shrugs and turns away. I look to Akari gratefully, rushing over and wrapping her in a hug.

“Akari, it’s so good to see you! I’ve missed you!”

“It’s so good to see you too. It feels like it’s been forever.” She hugs me tight and then steps back, a curious tilt to her smile. Nodding to the doughnut box, she lowers her voice. “So who’s it really from?” she asks.

I hesitate, caught off guard by her question. “I’m, um, not too sure,” I stumble to answer.

I’m still not ready to talk about Jason out loud. Not until I can untangle this knot of emotions inside of me, which only seems to become more tangled every time I think about him.

“Got it,” she says. There’s an awkward beat between us. Her arms hang by her sides and she touches her elbow, looking away. Then she looks back at me and smiles, her tone light again. “There’s a card,” she says, pointing to the box. “Maybe that’ll solve the mystery.” Her fingers move as if to take it, but I grab it quickly, clutching it in my hand. My fingers shake a little as I open it. There’s no signature, only a short message: Meet me backstage.

He wants to see me. Here, right now. My stomach flips into my heart, and I know I want to see him too.

“Sorry, Akari, I just have to… check on Leah real quick,” I say, flashing her an apologetic smile. Her own smile fades, and I feel a stab of guilt as I rush out of the dressing room. One more thing to make up to her.

Electric Flower is starting their performance as I run across backstage. From behind the curtain, I catch glimpses of the crowd waving glowsticks in the air with Leah right up front, singing along and recording everything on her phone. I see Kang Jina, center stage, looking flawless in a metallic blue jumpsuit. Her words from Jeju start to bubble up again, but I push them back down.

And then I see him. Jason.

He’s standing in a secluded corner backstage, watching the performance. He’s dressed in his costume, relaxed black joggers, paired with a perfectly fitted, light-gray sweatshirt. As if sensing me, he turns his head just as I approach him. He smiles, and there’s a nervousness in his face that I’ve never seen before.

“Hi,” I say.

“Hi.” He bounces his fists against each other, looking down at the ground and then back up at me with a shy smile. “Did you like the present?”

My heart swells at his uncertainty. Inside I’m screaming, Yes! But instead, I just nod. “I did. I loved it.”

His face lights up. “I’m glad.” He takes a deep breath and steps forward, lightly touching my hand. When I don’t pull away, he slips his fingers through mine, pressing our palms together. “Listen. I don’t want to pressure you if you’re not ready to talk about this. About us. On the plane, it just seemed like… like you knew what I wanted to say but you didn’t want me to say it.”

In that moment, with his skin touching mine, I can almost feel my worries melting away. I want so badly to choose him. For a moment it seems possible, as all the threads in my mind start to untangle, but instead of making my choice easier, they’re pulling in opposite directions and I don’t know which way to follow. I glance toward the stage, at Kang Jina and Electric Flower, out at the audience to Leah, and then back at Jason. For the last six years, being a K-pop star is all I’ve dreamed of. All I’ve wanted.

But what if that isn’t enough anymore? What if the endless hours of training and sacrifice, the tired bags under Appa’s eyes, the strain in Umma’s voice, the sad look on Leah’s face just aren’t worth it? What if I need more from life than a stage and a song? I look at Jason and I know. “You’re right. I wasn’t ready then. But I am now.” My voice is raw. He squeezes my hands, unfiltered hope shining out of his eyes. “I want to take a chance with you.”

And yet. I pull away as Electric Flower launches into their most popular single of the year, “Starlight River.” I might be ready to take a risk by dating Jason, but I’m definitely not ready to do it publicly. “Just… not here, not with all these people around.”

He takes a step forward, closing the gap between us. He’s so close, I can feel his chest rising and falling with each ragged breath. “What are you afraid of?”

All of a sudden, everything goes dark as a giant black cover floats down over the stadium, enveloping the whole place in an inky nightfall. LED starlight explodes across the cover as Electric Flower continues to sing onstage. The audience lets out a collective gasp, waving their glowsticks in wonder as the entire stadium is blanketed in pinpricks of sweeping light.

Jason doesn’t take his eyes off me. And other than the faint touch of starlight on his cheekbones, we’re cloaked in darkness where we stand. He cups one hand gently against my face, and I let my eyes close as I lean in.

I feel his lips press softly against mine. Warmth floods through my entire body as he moves his hand to the back of my neck, sparking in my stomach and out to my fingertips.

If I thought singing with him was magic, this is something else entirely.

My breath hitches as his hands slide down to my waist, pulling me in closer, and I wrap my arms around his neck. His lips part, and the scent of him pins itself to my heart as I open my mouth to breathe him in. Maple and mint.