I knew Riot. He was a member of the Club. He had lots of long, curly hair, a big barrel chest, wasn’t very tall and had an easy smile.

He was advancing toward middle age and not the way Buck was, looking younger than his years. Riot looked exactly as old as I figured he was, maybe older.

He didn’t work much out on jobs, he mostly worked in the store, but he came in regularly for coffee, cupcakes or cookies.

Last, he seemed a good guy of the Ink and Cruise variety, funny, teasing and could be gentle.

Gash, Minnie’s man, wasn’t funny, teasing and could be gentle. He was rough, had an edge and an attitude, like his woman.

My eyes scanned the room and fell on Buck’s photo frames.

When they did, for some reason, my legs went out from under me and I scooted off the bed, going to the dresser as I said, “So, you think she’ll be okay talking to Tatie?”

“She’ll be good with her. We’ll all be good with her, Clary. The family’ll see her through.”

I stared at Buck’s photos.

I’d dusted them and the dresser just that day.

Right then, I lifted my hand and made adjustments, moving photos so I could see them from behind other photos, shifting frames, my eyes running over them all.

“So,” I said softly into the phone, “the Club is family?”

“Yeah, babe, the boys, a brotherhood. Tighter than blood. Unbreakable. Even when they don’t get along, like now, it evens out, and it’s all good. They all know that, they just gotta work through their issues. We’re along for that ride. We hook up, we’re in. The brotherhood is the most important. Brothers then bitches, you know it, you live with it. But I been hooked up with assholes out there in the world and I’ll take my brother and his family anytime, rather than playin’ those games out there.”

I had to admit, being burned by Rogan and watching Tia get abused by Esposito, she had a point.

“Tighter than blood?” I asked.

“Yeah,” she answered.

“What about children?” I asked.

“That’s different, babe, kids are kids.”

“Oh,” I muttered, not actually getting it, then asked, “The brothers aren’t getting along?”

There was silence then, “Buck hasn’t shared?”

I adjusted a frame, not really looking at it. “No.”

“Uh…maybe I should let him do that.”

My hand arrested on a frame, and I whispered, “Is it bad?”

“They’re a brotherhood, Clary, but that don’t mean they see eye to eye on everything.”

Oh dear.

That didn’t sound good.

I knew the members now, and knowing them, I would guess a difference of opinion would manifest itself in far more dangerous ways than out in “the world.”

I stared at the frames. The people in them, save Buck, Tatiana and Gear, I didn’t know, and Buck hadn’t told me.

At the same time, I thought about what Minnie said, trouble in the Club, and I had no idea. And Buck had mentioned different uses for women, but he wouldn’t enlighten me, even though I’d asked. Further, there was the situation where Tatie had busted up a car and got caught joyriding, and he hadn’t told me that either.

It seemed there was quite a bit Buck didn’t share.

I now lived in a complicated world I didn’t understand, making the decision to enter that world during a trauma and without the information I needed, and now I was stuck.

There were things I didn’t like, things I didn’t get and things I wanted to know, and where I was, I had no right to know until Buck deigned to tell me.

None of this was good.

And none of it I could do a thing about.

“Clara, are you there?” Minnie called.

I adjusted a frame.

“I’m here,” I said, felt a presence, turned my head and saw Buck, wearing jeans, a T-shirt, boots and a very cool leather jacket with a bunch of patches on it I’d never seen him wear before, striding into the room. “Buck just got home,” I told Minnie, my eyes watching him approach me.

“Cool, I’ll let you go.”

“That isn’t necessary,” I stated as Buck stopped close to me.

His eyes shifted to the frames then to me. Then he bent and kissed my nose, turned and I saw the back of the jacket was exactly like the tattoo he had on his back, something I’d noted was on the leather vests or jackets many of the members wore, but the other members wore them all the time, not including Ink, Cruise, Gash and Riot who wore theirs only occasionally.

Presently, Buck shrugged it off, tossed it on the bed, and he walked straight back out.

“Now he’s gone. Beer time,” I guessed.

“Right,” she replied.

My eyes slid through the pictures then I walked to the bed and sat down next to his jacket. “I’ll talk to Tatiana tomorrow. I’ll let you know when to set up Debbie.”

“She’ll be okay,” Minnie assured.

I sighed then said, “I hope so.”

“Go be with your man,” she urged.

“Right,” I whispered, not sure I wanted to do that.

“Later, babe.”

“Later, Min.”

I disconnected, got up, walked to my nightstand and dropped the phone on top.

Then I heard, “Toots?”

I turned to see Tatiana standing in her pajamas just inside the door.

I smiled.

I liked her calling me Toots in that quiet, sweet voice.

“Hey, honey,” I replied.

“I’m…gonna,” she looked away and back at me, clearly hesitant, “hit the sack.”

“All right, sweetie. Good night.”

“Would you…?” She leaned in a bit then back and muttered, “Never mind.”

She started to leave, and I quickly walked forward, calling, “Tatie.”

She stopped, turned back to me, and I got close.

“What do you want, honey?” I asked softly.

“It’s stupid,” she whispered.

“Nothing’s stupid,” I assured her. “What do you want?”

She stared up at me and did this awhile.

“Baby,” I said gently, lifting a hand and shifting her hair off her shoulder. “Tell me what you want.”

“Would you…lie down with me? Just for a while. Just until I sleep. Talk to me like last night?”

Instantly I nodded, giving her a smile. “Let me get my nightgown on, you go lie down, and I’ll be right in.”

She stared up at me some more, unable to hide the surprise she felt at my easy agreement to her request, giving further evidence to the fact that her mom was seriously not much of a mom, before she whispered, “Thanks, Toots.”

“Anything, honey,” I whispered back.

She ducked her head and left the room.

I put on my nightie and robe, washed my face, brushed my teeth, moisturized and left the room too.

I walked to hers, closed the door behind me and crawled into her bed on top of her covers.

She curled into me, and I held her close, whispering to her, pieces of nothing, snatches of my life. The good parts, like Tia, her loyalty, her humor, her spirit (before Esposito broke it, though I didn’t share that), and Mrs. Jimenez, her tamales, how cute her grandchildren were, and other things, like how much I enjoyed college.