Faye took a deep breath and forced the memories away. She had made herself suppress the birth, but this situation was far too reminiscent of it. Even if no child was going to be born today. A life was going to be extinguished instead.

Her stomach tensed, then clenched. She bit her lip to stop herself crying. She had to stay strong, both for her own sake and for Julienne’s. Jack would be proud of her.

Her forehead felt feverish, sweat was sticking her clothes to her skin. Behind a screen she heard another woman sobbing.

“There, there, darling. It’s okay.”

Someone was comforting her, holding her.

Her stomach started to cramp. The seconds ticked by. She let out a gasp when it eased. She realized she had been tensing and holding her breath. She wanted to have someone there to comfort her as well. Couldn’t stand the loneliness any longer. She took her phone out and called Chris. Wept. Explained where she was. Didn’t care if anyone overheard. She let out a groan when another cramp came, and clutched the phone so hard her knuckles turned white.

Sweat was running down her back.

“I’m on my way,” Chris said. Like she always did.

“Really?” Faye sniffed.

“Of course I am, darling.”

Half an hour later the sound of Chris’s heels echoed along the corridor. She leaned over Faye. She stroked her hair with neatly manicured fingers. Wiped her brow with a napkin she took from her YSL sac de jour.

“I’m sorry,” Faye whispered. “Sorry for everything.”

“Don’t worry about that, darling. It is what it is. Now let’s just get through this and get out of here. Okay?”

Chris’s hoarse voice was simultaneously matter-of-fact and sympathetic, in a way that managed to calm Faye down. She had always been able to do that. Faye hadn’t realized how much she had missed that until now.

She met her gaze. “I love you.”

“And I love you,” Chris said. “I was with you when Julienne was born. Of course I’m going to be here now.”

Faye grimaced with pain and squeezed her hand. It was the most beautiful hand she had ever seen.

While a life was running out of her, she pressed her cheek against Chris’s hand.

STOCKHOLM, FEBRUARY 2003

WE WERE LIVING IN A three-room flat in Bergshamra. Jack’s uncle had wanted his apartment back when one of his children returned from abroad. It was on the red line of the metro, close to the city, but it was a different world. The neighbors were a mix of ordinary Swedes and migrant families. Chatty, friendly mothers. Children shouting and being noisy in the public spaces, but they were pleasant and well-behaved.

Jack and Henrik had both graduated from the Stockholm School of Economics, Henrik with top grades, Jack with average ones. But neither of them had tried to find work. They spent all their time trying to get Compare off the ground. The business idea was telemarketing, with a commission-based wage structure that was more aggressive than any similar company. Motivation, motivation, motivation, as Jack used to chant. His favorite quote was “Hungry wolves make the best hunters,” and the business model I had developed for them suited hungry wolves. More than anything, it suited two men who were as eager for glory as Jack and Henrik.

Our living room was their office. They shared a large desk and worked side by side on a couple of chairs I had found down in the garbage room but told Jack I had inherited from my grandmother.

I admired their intensity, and was convinced they were going to succeed, confident that they were well on their way. As a result I was taken by surprise one afternoon when I got home to find Jack sitting on the sofa, staring into space.

“What’s the matter, darling?” I said, sitting down beside him.

“We’ve run out of money. Henrik’s used up all his savings and I’ve gone cap in hand to try to get more capital, to no avail. I haven’t managed to find any investors. We simply weren’t good enough.”

He ran his hands through his hair.

“Maybe it isn’t a complete disaster. We’ll both be able to find jobs. Henrik’s talking about moving to London and getting a job in the financial sector. Maybe it would be just as well if we gave up these childish dreams and grew up. I’ll tell him I want out tomorrow, that would be the best way forward. I could go to London as well, that’s where the real money is. Or New York. Wall Street. Maybe I should go to Wall Street.”

Jack’s speech was intended to convince himself, but I could tell he didn’t mean a word of it. He was nowhere close to giving up on his dreams. And the very thought that he might move and leave me on my own again was enough to make me panic.

I couldn’t begin to imagine a life without Jack. Anxiety started to well up inside me, but I swallowed the nausea and said as calmly as I could, with my hand on his, “Where’s all this coming from? I thought it was going well, you both sounded enthusiastic as recently as last night when we went to bed. I heard you talking on the phone.”

“We were convinced we’d found some investors, but today we were informed that they aren’t interested after all. So we’ve got no money, darling. Right now we’re surviving on your student grant and that job in the café. I haven’t even been able to pay my mobile bill this month.”

The hopes of generations lay heavy on his shoulders, and the disappointment was etched in his face. He was the one who was going to put right everything his father had done, and restore the family’s honor. But now he was ready to give up his crusade.

I cupped his face with my hands.

“No. I’m not going to let you give up your dream.”

“Aren’t you listening? We need money. Some sort of income. And you’re still at college . . .”

He turned to look at me. His eyes were as deep and wet as a puppy’s. Jack needed me, in a way that no one ever had before.

“I can take a year’s sabbatical.”

“But you love college . . .”

Those blue eyes looked into mine, and I could already see the spark glinting in them, and that he was only raising objections for the sake of it.

“I love you more. And I know that you’re going to succeed, as long as you get the chance to do your thing. We’re a team, you and I. Jack and Faye. We’re going to take over the world, that’s what we’ve always said. I can graduate a year later, and what difference does one year make in the broader scheme of things?”

I shrugged.

“Are you absolutely sure?” Jack said, pulling me toward him.

“Of course I am,” I said with a laugh.

Happiness was bubbling inside me like a fizzy drink. I was giving him a gift, and he was accepting it, because he loved me.

“I know you’d have done the same for me. And I believe in Compare, I know we’re going to be millionaires. And then you can pay me back!”

“And I will! Everything that’s mine is yours, darling. Ours!”

He kissed me, then picked me up and carried me into the bedroom.

One year wasn’t so bad. And it meant everything for Compare. Not so much for my education. I found studying so easy, whereas Henrik had to work hard for his grades. Sure, I hated wiping tables, serving coffee, getting my backside pinched by old men who thought the waitress was included in the price of a coffee and pastry. But Jack was the love of my life. My soul mate. We held each other up. Next time it would be Jack volunteering to help me.

I informed the School of Economics of my decision that evening, and called my boss at the Café Madeleine. He was delighted. I knew he had plans to expand, but found it hard to get away from the day-to-day running of the café. There and then he offered me the position of personnel manager. The monthly salary felt dizzyingly large. Twenty-two thousand kronor. I said yes.

The only person who objected to my decision was Chris. She came into Madeleine’s at closing time with a black look in her eyes.

“You and I need to talk,” she said.

She dragged me across a rainy Stureplan and into a bar. She snapped at the bartender that she wanted two beers, then pushed me into one of the booths.

“I know this isn’t what you want to hear, and it might well make you angry with me. Maybe this is the end of our friendship. But someone’s got to say it! You’re making a mistake.”

I sighed. How would Chris be able to understand? What she and Henrik had was nowhere close to what Jack and I had.

“I know you only want what’s best for me. But this is something that has to be done. Jack needs to concentrate on Compare if their dream is going to become a reality.”

“What about your dream, then? Bloody hell, Faye, if Jack and Henrik had half your brains they’d be billionaires by now.”

“I’m happy as long as I’ve got Jack. And his dreams are my dreams.”

“Are you worried he’ll leave you if you don’t do this?”

“No.”

I almost started to laugh. The thought was so absurd. Obviously, his talk about London and New York had worried me a bit, but that was all it was: talk. Jack wanted to be with me as much as I wanted to be with him.

Chris gestured irritably to the bartender to bring us another glass each.

“In that case,” she muttered, “why can’t he put Compare on ice for a year while he works instead? Why are you the one who has to give up college for his sake?”